Saturday, February 23, 2008

Hooray for New Zealand

New Zealand have won the five-match one day series 3-1. Enough said on that. Balance has been restored to the Force. But I do say, rain is ruining the summer of cricket this year, in both New Zealand and here. The Duckworth Lewis system is evil. I propose that in future when a game is washed out they should consult with me as to who the winner should be. Bugger stats, I will award the rightful victor.

In other news, I cannot find a name for the Kolkata IPL team. I have found the Bangalore Royal Challengers, Chennai Super Kings and Delhi Daredevils and they're three of the lamest team names I've ever come across (and I played sport at primary school, believe it or not).

I am going to find a name for Kolkata. Not the Cats, because the Cats are a name of a football team here who won the flag, so no. Plus I'm acutely allergic to cats, and hate them. I even have a sticker on my car that says "Ask me about microwaving cats for fun and profit." They're horrid things. Anyway, I digress.

I'm not keen on alliteration, otherwise I'd be going with Kolkata Killer Cricketers. That's got to be up there with the Delhi Daredevils. But no, I think Kolkata should take a step forward to a more sophistcated name (and by more sophisticated, I mean sophisticated at all). Kolkata Superiority Detachment. Kolkata Doomsday Purveyors. Kolkata Giant Pandas. Kolkata Rebel Alliance. Ah better not use that one, Lucas would probably sue (it does sound good though, maybe the team's admin and Georgie Lucas could come to some sort of naming rights agreement, neither could lose.) Kolkata Gladiators. Kolkata Splendour. Kolkata Sorcerers.

For lack of ideas, I choose the Kolkata Rebel Alliance. And further to that, here is my cast.

Ricky Ponting - Han Solo
David Hussey - Luke Skywalker
Brendon McCullum - Chewie (his home planet is beautiful but he does sound funny)
Ajit Agarkar - Admiral Ackbar
Sourav Ganguly - C3PO
Murali Kartik - R2D2
Shoaib Akhtar - Lando Calrissian
Ishant Sharma - Wedge Antilles
Umar Gul - Dak
Chris Gayle - Obi Wan Kenobi
John Buchanan - Yoda

Shoaib Akhtar: [after realising the Delhi Daredevils aren't as lame as their name would have you believe] Home One, this is Gold Leader.
Ajit Agarkar: We saw it. All fieldsmen, prepare to retreat.
Shoaib Akhtar: We won't get another chance at this, Admiral.
Ajit Agarkar: We have no choice, General Akhtar! Our bowlers can't repel firepower of that magnitude!
Shoaib Akhtar: Ricky will have that shield down. We've got to give him more time!

If Punter was a bowler it'd work better. Still. Works for me.


Robin said...

Sorry but.. u can not under stand the significance of the name Chennai Super kings without knowing the culture and general lingo of Chennai .. Super is a very popular word in chennai and the name should not be without it.. Also Kings signify the lion, king of the jungle..

- Robin,
A Chennai Super Kings Fan

Miss Field said...

Hey Robin,
So if super is a popular word in Chennai, does that mean that in, say Hyderabad, it isn't?

I think that considering this is called the IPL but players are from everywhere so it's going to be a world event, it might have been prudent to pick a less culturally specific name. From what you said, no one outside of Chennai will get it, which is a bit disappointing.

If Western Australia submitted a team called the Ripper Sandgropers, based on your naming principles, I'm sure it would raise a few eyebrows.

Q said...

U call it Rebel Alliance and Soulberry calls it Sin City. And I love it :-)...I want part of that team.

Miss Field said...

Hey q, you can join Chinaman and Ruth and I in supporting the Kolkata Rebel Alliance... if you want to play for them though, well, we'd all like that sort of money, good luck with that!

Q said...

Miss Field, apart from Kolkata having an exhilarating team, they are also owned by my favorite - Shahrukh Khan, so I'm definitely in with u guys in supporting them - u wud notice that if u have read my posts :-)

When I said "I want part of that team", I didn't mean part of the playing XI, I meant part of their parties ;-)

Miss Field said...

I had noticed, I was hoping you meant you wanted to play for them, then we could have embarked on possibly the coolest quest ever. You could have even had your own reality TV show!

Still, I suppose their parties would suffice.

Q said...

Playing among the likes of Ponting, Gayle, Akhtar, Ganguly can only be a dream Ms. Field - the reality show would have then been to knock some reality into me ;-)

A party with them is a more realistic thought.

Miss Field said...

...the reality show would have then been to knock some reality into me ;-)

Hey, even getting gang-bashed by those four would make for top-rating TV.

Q said...

Hahaha, I'm sure it would.

I reckon I could take on Ganguly though and even Ponting, he's short ;-)...

Anonymous said...

Ms Fields,

Your KKR team is down and out and turned out to be the biggest jokers in the game. And Symonds "don't call me monkey" is back where he deserves- outside the field (may be he will make a good water boy).
I've always felt that women and cricket don't mix and you just made my day by proving it once and for all.

Gee thanks

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