Thursday, March 6, 2008

Do England actually want to win?

I don't think so. I think this morning, maybe even yesterday morning, Virgil Vaughan gathered the team around and they discussed the best tactics for getting to a draw.

"Listen up lads, I can't think of any good reason why we should bother trying to win, so let's have a competition to see how quickly we can get the crowd asleep. I'm betting three hours. The winner gets a go in the pedalo, the runner up gets to give young Ian a chinese burn on his right arm."

I'm watching the overs tick over, and consistently seeing no run... no run... no run... no run... no run... no run.

I mean, go the NZ bowlers for keeping the run rate down, but they'll be aiming for wickets, and it's not happening, not because they can't do it, but because Vaughan and Cook aren't even bothering to hit the ball!

Oh well. I think I'll be celebrating my 30th before they get to 100, but still, live in hope they'll get bowled out.

EDIT: About frigging time! Haha and Matthew Hoggard, the night watchman, has gone too. Good one.
"Picture yourself on the Waikato River, a new pedalo, all around blue skies. Or chinese burning, you'll twist that arm slowly. Watch the tears stream from Bell's eyes..."
Taking a leaf from Ricky Ponting's John Lennon book, Virgil Vaughan serenades the lads.
Photo: Getty Images

13 comments:

Jrod said...

Win, good thinking old bean, we should really start planning for it one day.

Toodle Pip.

Oomby Dave said...

Very Funny

Watching england get runs is like watching a dungbeetle take poo up Everest!

Suave said...

I love it, when The England start playing for a draw on day two of a test match.

JUST F*CKING LOVE IT!!!

NO HATRED IN MY HEART, I TELLS YA!!!!!

Miss Field said...

Yes, let's just imagine what a barrel of fun tomorrow is going to be.

The Atheist said...

Once again, an Australian misses the point of cricket.

It's not about "winning" or "fun". It's a sporting re-enactment of British soaps. All must be ground down by the relentless misery of it all before we can say it is successfully completed.

Rob said...

Personally I blame the New Zealanders. they clearly did not realise that they had to lie down and let the mighty England trample all over them. Shocking behaviour.

Watching last night (morning session day 3) I though Strauss had decided getting 20 was more than enough to get him picked for another year. He seemed to always expose his stumps and thump the ball to short extra cover...

http://cricket-forever.blogspot.com

The Atheist said...

Rob does have a fair point, this is probably where most sides have had it wrong over the last 30 years.

The Sporting Spirit said...

I have no idea, where that ASHES winning attitude has just gone away....where is that English team?

The Atheist said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Atheist said...

New Zealand?

Miss Field said...

Yes and in New Zealand it's highly unlikely they'll be able to claim bad light, and without that they're not much. Just wait until they get back for the matches in England, they'll look more familiar, Sporting Spirit.

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