I received something interesting in the mail at work today, and I sent my best mate Ruth the following text message: "You'll never guess which cricketer's photos landed on my desk this morning. I'll give you a clue, he's holding a bat but he really shouldn't be."
To which, quick as lightning, she replied: "Is it MPV?"
Fantastic! But no. "Sorry, couldn't resist. What is old Glenn up to these days?" she wrote.
Let me tell you.
It was a Landcare Australia media release and two proper old-school 4x6 glossy photographs of Glenn McGrath. I think they PhotoShopped his teeth. Also, his mullet has gone and the sensible climate change hippie haircut suits him far better.
He's on the global warming bandwagon, and is now an ambassador for Landcare. This particular media release is about a program called CarbonSMART which enables plebs like me to reduce my carbon footprint and purchase carbon credits for my household use. Quite an impressive concept.
Anyway, the old Pigeon. Arguably he should be more inclined to work at reducing his carbon footprint, by all accounts he has enormous feet. Ah, sorry.
Er. His quotes are amazingly, uncharacteristically articulate for the great man, and include such rhetoric as "My family is originally from the land. That's why I'm right behind Landcare."
"For example, adjusting our thermostat, changing the shower head and of course if I was still pulling on the whites, I'd be washing them in cold water!"
I think my life just changed. Did yours?
To the photos!
Here he is showing us what he does in the shower with his large tool.
He really is quite tall. I wonder if being taller than your shower door is a pain in the arse. I don't mean that in any literal sense, just wondering.
And here he is out the front of his carbon-neutral Cronulla mansion showing us what he does best......indeed. I think it's safe to say that if Glenn McGrath's batting had to save us all from global warming, well we're screwed aren't we? On both accounts we collectively half-close our eyes, half-turn away and think... let's just get this over with.
Finally, yes I bag him, but at least he's doing something worthwhile with his celebrity. "Landcare, yeah yeah" beats "Advanced Hair, yeah yeah" any day.
You save the world Glenn. I'm off to have a shower. Back in 30 minutes or so.
- ► 2009 (51)
- Outing the cricket demons
- Hot cross Poms
- News from the world of Australian cricket
- Cricket chemistry
- Decisions that shit me
- Hairy Maclary is back, but most certainly not sexy...
- Who wants to go a knight rider?
- Steph Broad and the doom of cricket
- Glenn McGrath: still useful
- The empire strikes back...
- "I come hither to die"
- New Zealand are great
- Do England actually want to win?
- Justin's going
- Like feeding time at the zoo...
- Pure NZ, 100%, oh yeah
- It's over
- Andrew Symonds shares the love
- Woes and woefulness
- ▼ March (19)