Friday, June 13, 2008

Ian Bell, a Facebook legend

Facebook loves Ian Bell, and some of the best-named groups for the whole of Facebook can be found when searching his name.

And considering there are only 11 Ian Bell related groups that I could discern, that's a pretty impressive feat.

Let us see.

The fans, seven groups...
Ian Bell appreciation society - 432 members - the page description reads Obviously the gretest English batsman of all time! however the second most recent post on the Wall says Yet another absolutely gash performance from the little ginger shit...how much longer can the useless twat take the place of a proper batsman??? Thank you for that contribution, Paul Worthington of Manchester. Mmm, fans indeed! If only I could be so gret.

There's I'm Ian Bell, the real Ian Bell, all the other Ian Bells are just imitating which, although uses a photo of Ian as its profile pic, otherwise is just a group for men named Ian Bell. There are 11 members.

Another good one, Ian Bell's Forearms, boasts three members. They all have the same surname and the two Wall posts are as follows:
Just look at those trunks for forearms. The Guy is a machine...
Me thinks you doth have too much time on your hands!!! xoxox


Love it.

On neutral ground is another top group, Keith (brother of Ian) Bell is a hero. With 19 members it's essentially, a group for his friends, but this page is so awesome because every single time Keith is mentioned, it's followed by "brother of Ian" in brackets.

Keith (brother of Ian) Bell is by far the best Bell. This group is for people to put forward their case for this. Example; Keith (brother of Ian) scored a century in each innings on his minor county debut, Ian never has. And when entered by Ian, Keith came third in a local six pack competition. Keith (brother of Ian) therefore is by far the best Bell. Please feel free to add your comments.

Such comments include: keith once had his drink spiked at OLs rugby club - barbara asked for his stomach to be pumped at the local hospital. the nurse took one looked at keith's famed six-pack and laughed in barbara's face. ian would have needed an IV drip for a week.

There are three anti-Ian groups, one called End the Bell!! - 17 members - whose recent news reads: Ian Bell still lives campaign harder my minions

Another is my favourite ever, called Beat Ian Bell around the head with his bat then stick stumps up his bum. I kid you not. The group - with 34 members - is For everyone who believes that Ian Bell is the biggest waste of space since time began. A few centuries in one day tests doth not an Ashes player make.

with one poster (from Manchester no less) writing At last, the public recognising what a waste of time the burns victim looking bed wetter is. Get some runs when it counts you half pint shitkicker! Ouch!

In fact here are some more comments. They're all priceless and I can't pick.
win one bloody ashes and they knight the whole fucking team......cabbages!

Ian Bell will never hit a ton against Australia..

i suspect that mark webb's defence of ian bell is based purely on ginger-solidarity. i vote his expulsion from the group.


And what do you know, a wall post from Paul Worthington of Manchester that says Yet another absolutely gash performance from the little ginger shit...how much longer can the useless twat take the place of a proper batsman??? Does anyone else see a pattern emerging here?

Incidentally, there's also a group called The England cricket team needs ME! with 181 members. Just noticed I still have this group here and most things now seem irrelevant except that England are still predominantly and exasperatingly shit! We all know that we can bat better than Strauss, Joyce and Vaughan. We all know that we can bowl better than Lewis, Anderson and Dalrymple. We all know that we can keep better than Read, Nixon and Jones. We all think that the team sheet would look better with our name on it.

Thank you Ian Bell, you bring amusement to the masses.

20 comments:

Suave said...

He's a useless Clarke Clone. Neither score runs when their bigger better friends do it, so both should die in a fire, I say.

Miss Field said...

Hell yeah. You bring the matches I'll get the petrol.

SixSixEight said...

Looks like someone has tried that before…..Ian ‘the cat with nine lives’ Bell?

How about a car over a cliff?

Ceci said...

You've missed the Un-Bell-ievable group - for the HOT Mr Bell. We are all very serious and dedicated fans

What are the Biff Smith groups like - the ones for AB and the pretty Saffer boys are very OMG!!!!!he's like SOOOOOOOO Awesome!!!!!

cdak said...

I'm feeling an almost unbearable compulsion to join "Ian Bell's Forearms"...this is distinctly worrying!

ankit said...

i have been reading your posts on players having facebook groups on their names, and well they make for a fun read..

i liked the greame smith one, so much, that i had to put a link for that post from ma blog.

keep going.. lets c you coming up with on Micheal Clark.

steve said...

Yeah, Miss, lets see you coming up on Michael Clark!

Suave said...

Jeebus wept woman..What's with the Think Googly game link. If I click on it, Kaspersky AV goes bat shit and screams at me

"17/06/2008 14:45:49 Malicious HTTP object thinkgoogly dot net : detected Trojan program 'Trojan-Clicker.HTML.IFrame.mq'."

Scary.

Wicket Maiden said...

Come on people, wishing Ian Bell dead is a bit extreme!!
I really want to see Keith's six pack though!! Miss Field didn't they have any pictures?? Lol

Miss Field said...

Yay you signed in again Wicket Maiden. I don't wish he's dead, I'd have to find someone else to despise then. Plus I'm not into martyring the ones I don't like! No pictures of Keith - shirt, I will email and ask though, just for you.

Suave, are you stealing credit card numbers again?

Thanks Ankit, which blog is yours?

Ceci, I did see yours but I know it's your group so many would already be aware of it. Plus you don't openly worship his forearms. The Smithy groups are where this all began... interesting to say the least. There's some loathing out there I tells ya, and most his from own people!

Michael Clarke will be soon, but this week's is someone a bit spesh, someone we all love (if you don't, I don't want to know, I have pitchfork that's longing to be put to good use).

Ta y'all!

Pay per head websites said...

a Facebook Legend?? seriously??? well I actually had not heard of Ian Bell until I read this post so not much of a legend LOL

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