Saturday, June 7, 2008

An ode to The England

Welcome to Miss Field's guest blogger, The Full Tosser's second post:

If you can name the title of this song and who sings the real version you will score a prize!

Best of luck and enjoy:

(A song about the most recent Ashes series)

Once upon a time you felt so fine
You crushed the Aussie pride, down the line, didn't you?
People'd call, say, "Beware now, they ain't minnows"
You thought they were all kiddin' you
You used to laugh about
Every ball that was, laying about
Now you don't chant so loud
Now you don't look so proud
About having to be scrounging for your next wicket

How does it feel?
How does it feel?
To be five nil down
Not able to turn it around
Like a Flintoff frown

You've gone to Adelaide Oval all right, scored big
But ya know ya gonna need to, keep the lead
And nobody has ever taught you how to swing that ball here
And now you find out you're gonna have to, give up the lead
You thought it'd never, come to this
But with Warney, Ponting and Gilchrist
They're not selling any Pommy Pride
As they stare into the vacuum of your eyes
And say, is that now two nil...?

How does it feel?
How does it feel?
To be five nil down
Not able to turn it around
Like a Flintoff frown

You always turned around to see the frowns of the Barmy crowd
When they all came down and shouted, chants for you
You never understood that you ain't no good
You should let other people tell you, what to do
You used to think that it would, somehow get better
But three then four and five nil then you ain't the winner
Ain't it hard when you discover that
Ian Bell was a twat
After he fucked up everything he could fuck up....

How does it feel?
How does it feel?
To be five nil down
Not able to turn it around
Like a Flintoff frown

Panesar in the stands and all the Pommy people
They're drinkin', thinkin' that they got it made
Exchanging all kinds of rhymes
But you'd better lift your retard head, it'd better dawn hey
You used to think that you're unbeatable
But Ricky in his Baggy Green and his pride too
Go to hell now, it sucks to be you, you can't refuse
When you got nothing, you got nothing to lose
You're shamed now, you got no pride to conceal

How does it feel?
How does it feel?
To be five nil down
Not able to turn it around
Like a bum in a crowd
Like a Flintoff frown


cricket connoisseur said...

Before I take a guess...What's the prize?

Anonymous said...

Don Bradman's signed Baggy Green which he wore in his final test match ever :)

©hinaman said...

My most favorite singer and song of all times; and a very good parody I must say,

©hinaman said...

I have to keep coming back to this,
would blogger FT give me permission to display it on my site?

With full acknowledgement, ofcourse.
I will not steal your work, Miss-field (I hope) will vouch for it.

My bloglink is back on BBC TMS again, so ...

Miss Field said...

Hey Chinaman, you can help yourself to any of the posts on here, anytime. When the author looks here again he will be pleased you like it.

I'm thrilled you're back on BBC TMS, good stuff! I keep meaning to email you. I'll get there.

Full Tosser said...

Mate you can post it where ever you like, just make sure you link back to this magnificent blog:)

Thanks for all the positive feedback, I can do another if ye all like, any requests?:P

©hinaman said...

@ Miss-Field, that's OK.
Being Florence Misfieldingale on a pacific islands must be back breaking. When you barter the lamp for a laptop, drop me a line.
Thanks for letting me use some of your blogs. It will see me through the the bloggers cramps.

@ FullTosser,
that is a disc that never gets changed in my car, its my commuting companion. I would have never believed the song could be transformed into an Ode to Flintoff's Frown. :-D

I found myself this morning wanting to hum the new words instead.

Chinaman said...

Hi guys,
This is what i receive from a BBC producer for having published this on my blogspage.

...see that the content on your blog is largely OK though actually I'm not at all sure about your latest blog entry - the Freddie Flintoff poem - with its vulgar language. On a serious note, I may have to re-consider. I am not going to recommend content with the words "twat" and "fuck" in them.

And I will give you the chance to answer to the Flintoff poem on your site before I remove the link from our blog again." :Unquote.

I decided I was not answerable to a BBC producer about what I publish on my own website.
I chose to have my link removed.

Is it me being too cynical, or is this world getting increasingly hypocritical?

Miss Field said...

That's the English being precious. If that had been about Ricky Ponting he probably would have applauded you for it.

Although he would say he wouldn't.

Full Tosser said...

Bugger, will have to come back with somethng less vulgar, more scathing;)

©hinaman said...

@ The Full Tosser,
Hiya, you asked for requests, I have thought of one.

Well, it was the Edgbaston fiasco of yesterday made me think of it. It makes me wonder why in 37 years of ODIs, no one anticipated such a fiasco, almost as if, ...

Jon Fogerty's
"Have you ever seen the rain?"

I nearly made it the title of my recent blog, but thought you may be able to drag out more from it.

What do you reckon?

Bekus said...

God I can't wait 'til next summer! I can only pray that there'll be some Aussies munching on humble pie by the end of it! Do I have to remind anybody what happened last time you toured?!? And yes, I'm aware I've just opened opened the door to a million '5-0' style responses, but I don't care! The truth is you all wish Flintoff was Australian!

By the way though, very creative song writing! Quite impressive! Maybe it'll catch on with Aussie cricket fans. I hope so, cos I was at the MCG and the SCG in 2006/7 and all I heard all day from the 'Fanatics' was endless cries of 'Warney' and 'Aussie, Aussie, Aussie'!!! Learn some new chants guys!

Miss Field said...

Yo Bekus, simple though our chants may be, at least they are about the players and team and not the group of people singing them.

Anyway, at the WACA in December 06 I mostly heard chants of "Three two"... which was as funny then as it is now.

And I actually don't wish Andrew Flintoff was Australian. He's all yours.


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